“Don’t open the door for me, i can do it myself , I’m not weak or arm less” What an irony, we want to be treated like a queen but dont want to be called a lady.

BROKENNESS…I had no deep knowledge of this word until very, very recently, you would be surprised how much knowledge you can unveil in a word if and when you think deeply enough about it. The dictionary defines ‘broken’ as ‘physically and forcibly separated into pieces, cracked or split; or legally or emotionally destroyed’.

I read a book by Michelle McKinney Hammond ‘The Power of being a Woman’ and she spoke about the whole idea of feminism in the first chapter. Feminism (the fight for equality) has become the main order of the day; women no longer fight as much for peace, tranquility, marriage, children and safety. We are immersed in the fight for equal rights. Don’t get me wrong, am not saying the idea isn’t valid or that I don’t believe in equality (to an extent though, because we really can’t have it all).

However taking a closer look at it, MEN ARE MADE TO BE THE HEAD at all times, this has being since creation. I understand the fact that there are men out there who take this headship title to the extreme but, taking it down to the nitty- gritty of creation, we are WOMEN, help-meet, companions, encouragers, peacemakers and above all we are STRONG pillars (Supporters).

She also spoke about the fact that women are forgetting how to be who they are because they are trying so hard to meet up with the men. We are striving so hard to wipe away that feminine part of us, replacing it with a strong head and the thirst for equality. I know this might raise a lot of eyebrows, but yes it is the ugly truth we have avoided for so long. One thing we do not seem to understand is that the whole idea of being broken lies greatly on us (Women).

There are really some things that we aren’t cut out for, maybe this is one of the reasons why men are fast loosing respect for us, they are beginning to look and treat us like men. But we aren’t! We can do a lot, much better than men, yet we aren’t men and we should be proud of that. We should know when to let humility take its place, obey and submit and above all, we should know that doing this doesn’t mean you are inferior to the masculine gender. My friend frequently tells me that the way I treat men generally will tell on how I treat my partner eventually. I can’t be very nice to my husband, yet put up an ugly attitude to another man outside my relationship.

Michelle says, Men and women are created differently and were created so deliberately by God. Yet present-day moral issues and the fight for equal rights have left most men and women confused about who they are, where they fit and what they mean to one another. You can’t switch your duties, its nature and it’s fixed permanently.  Maybe one of the reasons our relationship doesn’t work is because we have forgotten how to be women, we are so busy trying to keep up in a race that doesn’t exist in the first place.

Brokenness… the woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam, not made out of his head to rule over him, nor out of his side to be equal with him, but under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be loved. What’s more? I think our major fear is showing men this side of us and watch them take advantage of it, but it is true in many cases, but not in all. A man, who truly understands the concept of love knows that your submission is not stupidity. Therefore, he is wise enough to know that taking advantage of your respect will affect things. We are women, let’s glory in it. It’s not a shame and it’s not a weakness, if anything it is a STRENGTH.

I am a woman and he’s a man, yes I have  a right to everything, but  I have priorities, if the fight for equity  will hinder or distract my priorities, then I  should and would avoid it. Being broken means: accepting your priorities come first to certain people and certain things, that if we are to fulfill destiny and achieve purpose then the headship title is really not ours. How about single mothers that do a perfect work with their children? Yes, they do. But am pretty sure, there is no woman who wouldn’t want a working relationship if they had the chance. There is always more to the story.

In conclusion, am not against women fighting for equal rights, but I am against women who put aside their femininity for it, I am against women who think showing their feminine part is a trait of weakness. I am a woman, full of life, I have a womb that will birth nations, I am proud of my tears and my femininity. I have all rights, but I have major priorities.- Motolani Olanipekun

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